Saturday 4 August 2012

In a relationship, married or not... YOU SHOULD READ THIS!

MARRIAGE
When I got home that night as my wife
served dinner, I held her hand and
said, I've got something to tell you. She
sat down and ate quietly. Again I
observed the hurt in her eyes.Suddenly
I didn't know how to open my mouth.
But I had to let her know what I was
thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the
topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my
words, instead she asked me softly,
why?
I avoided her question. This made her
angry. She threw away the chopsticks
and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other.
She was weeping. I knew she wanted
to find out what had happened to our
marriage. But I could hardly give her a
satisfactory answer; she had lost my
heart to Jane. I didn't love her
anymore. I just pitied her!With a deep
sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce
agreement which stated that she could
own our house, our car, and 30%
stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into
pieces. The woman who had spent ten
years of her life with me had become a
stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted
time, resources and energy but I could
not take back what I had said for I
loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried
loudly in front of me, which was what I
had expected to see. To me her cry
was actually a kind of release. The idea
of divorce which had obsessed me for
several weeks seemed to be firmer and
clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very
late and found her writing something
at the table. I didn't have supper but
went straight to sleep and fell asleep
very fast because I was tired after an
eventful day with Jane.When I woke up,
she was still there at the table writing. I
just did not care so I turned over and
was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her
divorce conditions: she didn't want
anything from me, but needed a
month's notice before the divorce. She
requested that in that one month we
both struggle to live as normal a life as
possible. Her reasons were simple: our
son had his exams in a month's time
and she didn't want to disrupt him
with our broken marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had
something more, she asked me to
recall how I had carried her into out
bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the
month's duration I carry her out of
our bedroom to the front door ever
morning. I thought she was going
crazy. Just to make our last days
together bearable I accepted her odd
request.I told Jane about my wife's
divorce conditions. . She laughed
loudly and thought it was absurd. No
matter what tricks she applies, she has
to face the divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn't had any body
contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried
her out on the first day, we both
appeared clumsy. Our son clapped
behind us, daddy is holding mommy in
his arms. His words brought me a
sense of pain. From the bedroom to
the sitting room, then to the door, I
walked over ten meters with her in my
arms. She closed her eyes and said
softly; don't tell our son about the
divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat
upset. I put her down outsidethe door.
She went to wait for the bus to work. I
drove alone to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted
much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. I could smell the fragrance of
her blouse. I realized that I hadn't
looked at this woman carefully for a
long time. I realized she was not young
any more. There were fine wrinkles on
her face, her hair was graying! Our
marriage had taken its toll on her. For
a minute I wondered what I had done
to her.On the fourth day, when I lifted
her up, I felt a sense of intimacy
returning. This was the woman who
had given ten years of her life to
me.On the fifth and sixth day, I
realized that our sense of intimacy was
growing again. I didn't tell Jane about
this. It became easier to carry her as
the month slipped by. Perhaps the
everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one
morning. She tried on quite a few
dresses but could not find a suitable
one. Then she sighed, all my dresses
have grown bigger. I suddenly realized
that she had grown so thin, that was
the reason why I could carry her more
easily.Suddenly it hit me... she had
buried so much pain and bitterness in
her heart. Subconsciously I reached
out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and
said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out.
To him, seeing his father carrying his
mother out had become an essential
part of his life. My wife gestured to our
son to come closer and hugged him
tightly. I turned my face away because I
was afraid I might change my mind at
this last minute. I then held her in my
arms, walking from the bedroom,
through the sitting room, to the
hallway. Her hand surrounded my
neck softly and naturally. I held her
body tightly; it was just like our
wedding day.But her much lighter
weight made me sad. On the last day,
when I held her in my arms I could
hardly move a step. Our son had gone
to school. I held her tightly and said, I
hadn't noticed that our life lacked
intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the
car swiftly without locking the door. I
was afraid any delay would make me
change my mind...I walked upstairs.
Jane opened the door and I said to
her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the
divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and
then touched my forehead. Do you
have a fever? She said. I moved her
hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I
won't divorce. My marriage life was
boring probably because she and I
didn't value the details of our lives, not
because we didn't love each other
anymore. Now I realize that since I
carried her into my home on our
wedding day I am supposed to hold
her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She
gave me a loud slap and then
slammed the door and burst into
tears. I walked downstairs and drove
away.
At the floral shop on the way, I
ordered a bouquet of flowers for my
wife. The salesgirl asked me what to
write on the card. I smiled and wrote,
I'll carry you out every morning until
death do us apart.That evening I
arrived home, flowers in my hands, a
smile on my face, I run up stairs, only
to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for
months and I was so busy with Jane to
even notice. She knew that she would
die soon and she wanted to save me
from the whatever negative reaction
from our son, in case we push thru
with the divorce. At least, in the eyes
of our son-
I'm a loving husband....
The small details of your lives are what
really matter in a relationship. It is not
the mansion, the car, property, the
money in the bank. These create an
environment conducive for happiness
but cannot give happiness in
themselves. So find time to be your
spouse's friend and do those little
things for each other that build
intimacy. Do have a real happy
marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will
happen to you.If you do, you just
might save a marriage.Many of life's
failures are people who did not realize
how close they were to success when
they gave up.

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